You know the type. The girls who when you see, you immediately regret your “girl next door” theme for the week day. Yeah, I should’ve let my hair down instead of trying to master the top knot to cover dandruff in my hair that I haven’t washed in five days. Why did I buy that hair wand if I’m not going to use it?! She’s so pretty. I’m pretty, right? Are those her real lashes?! Oh she’s pretty AND nice…and on goes this internal dialogue of self-hatred and comparison. When getting ready to go out, I practically wear what will make me feel confident while standing next to you-instead of just wearing what I want to wear. As if, who I am depends on who you compare me to. Well ladies, here you go (this deserves a new paragraph):

Acknowledging someone else’s beauty does not take from your own…it took me over 20 years to get this. What the hell am I talking about?! I am STILL trying to get this!!! Ladies, there’s no need to shy away from noticing and encouraging another woman’s beauty, humor, confidence, ANYTHING! Because her gift does not take from your own. Her beach waves do not diminish your sleek hair. Her humor does not mean you’re boring. Her talents do not mean there is not enough room in the world for you to have them too. Let the beauty of another woman provide the platform on which you are to shine! And vice versa.

I sometimes struggle with other pretty women, but for me, I feel self-conscious when another woman is laid back and carefree or when she is a super-healthy eater. It’s because, try as I might, I’m a “particular” person. I’m not, what you’d say, “go with the flow”. Plus, I love chocolate…cake…chocolate cake…anything SWEET. So though I eat my vegetables, I feel inadequate in the healthy sector. To help me in this endeavor, I always IMMEDIATELY think of something I like about a woman when I meet her-like genuinely like about her, and if I’m brave…I tell her. #yourhairlooksfabulous #iloveyourpassion #icanseeyoudbegoodatthat #youhaveaniceshape

The more you do it, the more your perspective shifts. You start looking for the beautiful….in her…in yourself.

And trust me sister. You will find it.